I’m no longer obsessed with The Great British Bake Off – and it’s not because it moved to Channel 4 :-: Metro

I’m no longer obsessed with The Great British Bake Off – and it’s not because it moved to Channel 4 :-: Metro

Anyone else just not that obsessed anymore? (Picture: Mark Bourdillon/Channel 4 Television/PA Wire) ..

I'm no longer obsessed with GBBO - and it's not because it moved to Channel 4
Anyone else just not that obsessed anymore? (Picture: Mark Bourdillon/Channel 4 Television/PA Wire)

I’m putting it out there – I am a Great British Bake Off addict.

For the last couple of years, I basically organised my entire social life around Bake Off Wednesdays. Basically, if you wanted me to do anything on a Wednesday between 8pm and 9pm for a good eight week run, you were a) clearly delusional and b) not my friend.

I cried when Val was voted off. I laughed when things went to s*** in the technical. And I sharpened my pitchfork when Diana took Ian’s Baked Alaska out of the freezer.

I'm no longer obsessed with GBBO - and it's not because it moved to Channel 4

So I was pretty nervous when my beloved Bake Off moved from the BBC to Channel 4, without Mary Berry, Mel and Sue. What would become of the one constant joy in this garbage world?

Well, when it began at the end of the August, my mind was put as ease as everything seemed pretty much the same.

The tent was identical. I loved Noel Fielding and Sandi Toksvig, and Sandi’s voice is similar enough to Sue Perkins’ to woo me into comfort. While Mary Berry is obviously queen, Prue Leith is likeable, and Paul Hollywood hasn’t changed an iota.

But something feels different. I’m not completely obsessed anymore. If I miss an episode, I am not utterly furious when it gets spoiled for me. I didn’t even start a work sweepstake.

So what’s happened?

I'm no longer obsessed with GBBO - and it's not because it moved to Channel 4
The new line-up of Noel, Sandi, Paul and Prue is great (Picture: Channel 4)

On last night’s episode, lovely Liam was given the boot. It was an outrage, a scandal, a national issue that deserves an inquiry.

When his name was announced, I was livid. Stacey baked literal baking parchment into a pie last week, but Liam’s spun sugar melts slightly and he misses the quarter final? Mel and Sue would not have stood for this s***.

Then I realised. That was the first time I was properly invested in a baker on the current series. Yes, I adored Flo and her love of gin and dancing to Meghan Trainor with her mates, and Yan’s mix of science and cake was delightful. But week in, week out, I just *whisper* didn’t care that much who stayed or went.

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And while I am absolutely ready-to-protest furious that Liam has been given the boot (seriously, Kate dropped a clanger on the floor!), I don’t particularly mind who wins from now on. Yeah, sure, I’ll obviously watch. I’ll tweet. But if I miss five minutes of it, I won’t be screaming at my housemates to PRESS RECORD FOR GOD’S SAKE WE’RE MISSING PRECIOUS INNUENDOS.

Could it be that the hosts and judges don’t actually matter to Bake Off – that it’s all about the bakers? The C4 series is doing well in the ratings, but hasn’t attracted the outrage and national together-ness that it has in previous years over at the Beeb. And I reckon that could be due to the baker line-up, rather than the celebrity names.

I'm no longer obsessed with GBBO - and it's not because it moved to Channel 4
I’m just not interested in perfect bakes on week one, tbqh (Picture: Channel 4)

Now, all of the bakers seem like lovely people, and are obviously hugely talented. The standard this year has been through the roof. But we never tuned into GBBO to see people make perfect cakes that actually look like ham sandwiches or ramen.

We want big personalities. We want women who listen to their cakes and dance to Ed Sheeran. We want people looking utterly baffled when Mel and Sue utter the name of a foreign bake. We want one person who refuses to deviate from tradition and has never heard of pesto (Norman, never forget). And we want a dishy guy who you could take home to your mam but also be very thirsty over with the rest of the UK (read: Selasi, Tamal, etc).

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This year, the standard is too high for any super-relatable errors, and everyone seems a bit too serious and professional to really bond with over the TV screen.

And for a show that started with contestants making cupcakes and lemon drizzle cake, it’s a darn shame.

I’ll always love Bake Off as a friend. But I may have fallen out of love with it.

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