Samantha Bee: Mitch McConnell And Paul Ryan As Compromised By Vladimir Putin As Donald Trump

Samantha Bee: Mitch McConnell And Paul Ryan As Compromised By Vladimir Putin As Donald Trump

[embedded content] Samantha Bee opened Full Frontal with a “Здравствуйте to Our Ne..

Samantha Bee opened Full Frontal with a “Здравствуйте to Our New Mother Russia” segment, “to please our new masters,” saying “Hello, my name is Samantha Bee, Welcome to Full Frontal” in her countrys new native tongue.

Then she torched Republicans and journalists who claimed this week to be shocked – shocked! – to discover “President Trump is terrible for the first time, all over again” during his Helsinki presser with Russian ruler Vladimir Putin.

We will never know who to believe as to whether Russia meddled in our 2016 election: “Trumps own intelligence agencies or the guy who smiles like he can only orgasm when a journalist dies,” Bee predicted.

As Trump and Putin roasted the United States together on stage in Helsinki, not one part of Trumps groveling was new material.

Nonetheless, Republicans felt the need to pretend to be shocked including Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell who declared “Russia is not our friend” though, as Bee noted, “Mitchs only friend is the insurance lobbyist who lives in his neck wattle.”

There are things Republicans could have been doing to protect the republic “from the bronzer stain Trump is leaving on it” and make sure our next election is not vulnerable to Russian hacks. Which, Bee pointed out, “approximately no one is doing.”

Pass a bill to protect Robert Muellers investigation, for instance, “like the one McConnell killed in the senate and [House Speaker Paul] Ryan said wasnt necessary.”

Republican leaders are every bit as compromised by Russia as Trump…Actually the are worse,” Bee insisted, because McConnell and Ryan have put up with whatever Putin wants, though, “as far as we know, they havent been peed on by anyone.”

But, while Republicans had every reason to pretend Trumps public surrender to Russia came as a surprise, Bee wondered what is journalists excuse. “No one in your profession should be this shocked the 50th time someone does something,” she scolded of their on-air reax to Trumps Helsinki performance.

“How can you be shocked by the president saying the exact same thing hes said countless times before? Thats like being shocked to come home and find your dog drinking out of the toilet bowl or licking his own balls.”

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